


The Way You Look Tonight

by jadztone



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Breaking Up & Making Up, Don't copy to another site, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 16:53:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19155133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadztone/pseuds/jadztone
Summary: Draco is hit hard by how gorgeous Neville looks tonight.  It's the first time he's seen him since Neville left him without explanation.  As hurt as he feels, Draco still loves him and longs for answers.





	The Way You Look Tonight

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for Chubby Neville Fest. The song is The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra.

_With each word your tenderness grows_  
_Tearin' my fear apart_  
_And that laugh, wrinkles your nose_  
_Touches my foolish heart_

Draco had known in his heart that it was too good to be true.  But his heart had been foolish, letting each soft and tender word that Nev spoke to him chip away at the fear that has resided within since his sixth year at Hogwarts.  His fear had been his weapon, his protection, keeping people at arm’s length.  But Nev’s laugh, the way his nose wrinkled, had disarmed Draco.  The fear was gone.  And now, unfortunately, so was Neville.  Draco was empty and defenseless.

* 

Draco stepped inside Luna’s house, snow swirling into the foyer as the door swung shut.  And of course, _of course_ , he caught sight of Neville immediately.  He was standing by the fire, the dancing flames making his skin glow.  Or maybe the light that seemed to shine around him was from his soft smile as he gazed down at Ginny.  Her arms were waving around as she shared what was probably a funny anecdote.  He didn’t look up at Draco’s entry.

Draco dragged his gaze away from Nev and focused on Luna’s smiling face.  He introduced his date, a graduate of Durmstrang that Draco had befriended during the Triwizard Tournament.  Draco ran into him a couple weeks ago and he agreed to be Draco’s plus one.  He might not have said yes if he had known that the only reason Draco wanted him there was to help him cope with seeing Neville for the first time since their break up.  If one could call it a break up when there’d never actually been a discussion about ending their relationship. 

After about an hour of mingling, Draco was vaguely aware that he was royally pissing off his date, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.  He couldn’t take his eyes off Neville, memories of their time together playing relentlessly in his head.  The time they went to the beach.  Cuddling with him on the couch.  His whiskery kisses.  He looked gorgeous in his dress robes.  It was his first time seeing Neville dressed that way since the Yule Ball.  Draco wondered if he had tied his own bow tie or if he’d had help.  There was no sign so far that Neville had also brought a plus one.

Draco was broken out of his reverie by whining at his elbow.  “I hope you are really good in bed, because this party is a bore. Why are we in dress robes?  I thought you were taking me to a formal event, this is just someone’s home.”

Draco gave his companion a disgusted look.  “Luna likes dressing up, and we indulge her because she’s amazing. And you’re presuming an awful lot about how our date’s going to end.”  The truth was, Draco _had_ planned to make himself get on with it later tonight.  He hadn’t had sex in a very long time, not since before he and Neville started dating. 

Ever since Neville ghosted him - disappearing from his flat and his life like he’d never been there – one of Draco’s regrets was that they never did have sex.  He never got a chance to sink into Neville’s warm flesh and feel those thick strong arms hold him all night long and feel protected and cherished.  And now that the opportunity had passed, he couldn’t bring himself to be that way with anyone else.  He thought he might finally get to that point tonight, but after seeing Neville, he knew it wasn’t going to happen.  Judging by the look on his date’s face, he obviously came to the same conclusion.

 _When the world is cold_  
_I will feel a glow just thinking of you_  
_And the way you look tonight_

Draco was in the kitchen, making a gin and tonic strong enough to wilt his bow tie, when he felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up. He turned and saw Neville in the doorway.  There was a mostly empty tumbler in his hand, clearly he was here to refresh his drink.  Draco took several steps away from the liquor table, and Neville moved warily towards it. 

Draco marveled to himself at how much he’d changed since school.  The old Draco, if finally faced with the man who hurt him, would have shouted quite a lot, sneering and lashing out with scornful words.  Now all he wanted to do was get away.  He sidled towards the doorway, about to make his escape, when Neville spoke.  “I suppose I’m not surprised that your date is just like you.  Gorgeous..posh…slim.  Good on you, I guess, for finding someone that the world will understand.”

Draco gave him a befuddled look.  “What the hell are you on about?”

Neville shrugged one shoulder in a jerky way.  “I’m just saying he won’t make anyone wonder why you’re together.”

Draco blinked.  Something teased in the back of his mind.  A memory he couldn’t quite grasp.  Shaking it off, he decided that perhaps he was feeling confrontational after all.  “I still don’t know what the hell you’re on about, but I bet it would make sense if you were to do the decent thing and tell me why you left me without a word.”

Neville lifted his chin.  “Decent?  I don’t know that you’ve earned decency.”

Draco gaped at him.  “ _Earned_?  You…you said that everything from before the war was behind us!  A clean slate, you said!  I knew it!  I knew you couldn’t possibly…”

Neville cut in, “That’s not what this is about!  I’m telling you that I _heard_ you.  What you said to Pansy Parkinson that day.” 

Draco scowled.  “Pansy?  I’ve not said anything to her that should make you run off like you did!  Not in a long time, anyway.”

Neville was incredulous.  “You really don’t think you said anything wrong.  Unbelievable.  How did you _think_ I would feel hearing you saying how you wished I was more like you?  That when we went out, people would look at us and wonder why we’re together.  Wonder what’s the attraction?”

Draco felt his cheeks burning.  He remembered that discussion.  He’d been so full of self-doubt that day, and when Pansy asked what was wrong, it had all come pouring out.  “Neville, did you think I meant that I don’t find _you_ attractive?”  When Neville looked away, Draco took a step closer.  “Nev, I wouldn’t date you if I didn’t find you desirable.  We would just be friends if that was the case.  Of _course_ I want you, Neville. Just look at all the snogging we did!”

Neville looked down and mumbled, “Yeah, snogging was _all_ we did.”

Draco made a little noise of disbelief.  “I thought you wanted to take it slowly! I was trying to be a gentleman for once in my life.”

Neville’s expression turned stormy.  “Bollocks!  That’s not what you said to Pansy!  You didn’t try to take me to bed because you weren’t keen on the idea of getting naked with me.  You said it would be a turnoff, and then she made a crack about solving the problem by turning the lights out.”

Draco flushed pink remembering how difficult it had been to say these things out loud.  And Neville had overheard them.  “I don’t get it, why did airing all my insecurities make you want to leave me?  Is it because you don’t want to be with someone who’s not confident?”

Neville sighed deeply, and Draco was gobsmacked to see that his eyes were radiating pain.  “Your insecurities?  Yeah, I suppose that’s at the core of why you would even care what shallow people think of you dating a man of my size.  Did someone say something to you?  Was that what killed whatever attraction you felt for me?  You saw me through their eyes?”

Draco’s mouth dropped open.  A man of his size??  What in Merlin’s beard was he talking about?  A suspicion began to form.  “Neville…did you not hear the _entire_ conversation?”

Neville scowled.  “No, your voices were too low so I only heard bits and pieces.  Probably a good thing, I might have heard worse.”

Draco threw his hands up in the air at having his suspicions confirmed.  “No, no, _no_!  Blast it all, Neville, you missed all the important bits.  When I said people were wondering, I was talking about them wondering why kind, sweet, gentle Neville would want to be with a stuck up, bigoted, posh git.  You’re a war hero, I’m a death eater.  I could see it in their eyes whenever we went out, and it made me doubt what you could possibly see in me.  I figured if you were more like me, I wouldn’t have to worry about you someday coming to your senses.”

Neville opened his mouth, then closed it, at a loss for words.  Draco went on, “And you clearly missed the part where my issues with us getting naked were due to my _dark mark_.”  He made a frustrated gesture at his forearm.  “I can barely stand to look at it myself, I was sure you’d be completely turned off by it.”

Neville continued staring at him, utterly flabbergasted.  He finally spoke, his voice small and uncertain.  “So…this isn’t about my weight?”

Draco felt the stinging sensation of tears forming.  “I can’t believe you thought that’s what I meant.”  He shook his head.  “No, that’s not true.  I _can_ believe it. I wouldn’t put it past myself to have said something about your weight when we were at Hogwarts.  My goal back then was to always strike where people were the most vulnerable.  I’m _sorry_ , Neville.  But you have to know, I don’t think that way about you, now.  I think you are lovely, inside and out, and the way you look tonight…I haven’t been able to take my eyes off you.  I miss you so badly, Neville, _please_.”

 _Yes, you're lovely, with your smile so warm_  
_And your cheeks so soft_  
_There is nothing for me but to love you_  
_And the way you look tonight_

The words had barely passed his lips before Neville was catapulting towards him and gathering him in his arms.  Draco felt almost too weak to stand, and he didn’t know whether it was from relief or the feeling of those arms around him once more.  It was all a misunderstanding.  Neville wasn’t rejecting him, he had though _he_ was being rejected.  “I hate that for even one minute you thought I didn’t want you, Neville.  Want all of you.”

Neville took a shuddering breath, his face buried in Draco’s hair.  “I hate that you let that stupid bloody tattoo mess with your head.  I’d totally forgot you even had it.  I didn’t see it when we went to the beach.”

Draco huffed out a shaky laugh.  “I was using a glamour.  Easy enough to conjure, but I wouldn’t have been able to keep it going during sex.”

Neville exhaled in frustration.  “I can’t believe this whole time I thought you were talking about _me_.  If only I’d confronted you instead of running away.  I just couldn’t face you with how devastated I felt.  Bloody hell, my disappearing act probably reinforced all your doubts about yourself.  I’m so, so sorry, Draco.”

Draco’s throat closed up, and in lieu of talking he began to kiss all over Neville’s neck and face, ending at his lips.  He wrapped his arms around Neville’s neck and pulled him in tightly, kissing him over and over.  After a while he pulled back to breathe and began nuzzling the area of soft skin on Neville’s cheek above his beard line.  “It doesn’t matter anymore.  We’ll take this as a lesson to trust each other enough to talk it out.”  He continued kissing him, over and over until he began to shiver with desire.

Draco took several deep breaths to gain control, and then fixed Neville with a sultry gaze.  “From now on if you overhear me talking about someone, you’ll know for sure it’s you when I say things like ‘His warm smile makes me glow inside. When he turns on the charm, it takes my breath away. He’s the tenderest lover.  He’s so gorgeous and lovely and wonderful and I hope he never changes.  Oh, and have you seen the way he looks tonight?  I love him so much.’”

Neville’s eyes were glistening with tears as he whispered, “I love you, too, Draco.  I don’t think I realised it until I’d left and I had to somehow live my life with this giant hole in my heart.”  Draco was very, _very_ glad for the arms around him, because otherwise he would have melted into a puddle right then and there.  He felt goosebumps form all over when Neville gave him a filthy smile and continued, “Don’t think I missed that bit about being a tender lover.  You don’t really know that.  _Yet_.”

 Draco continued kissing various parts of Neville’s face.  “As if you could be anything else. But you’re right, it would technically be a lie.  Best remedy that straight away.”

The swiftness with which Neville escorted him out of the kitchen and over to Luna to say their goodbyes had Draco giggling and full of light.  He didn’t feel bad for ditching his date, as the wizard in question was currently in a corner snogging Justin Finch Fletchley. 

When they apparated back to Neville’s flat, Draco barely felt it as his stomach was already swooping in anticipation.  He was already enchanted with the way Neville looked tonight in his dress robes, and Draco had a feeling he was going to look much better out of them.

 _Lovely, never, never change_  
_Keep that breathless charm_  
_Won't you please arrange it?_  
_'Cause I love you_  
_Just the way you look tonight_

__

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I had done 4 collages for this ficlet, but I found out after the fact that one of the models I used turned out to be extremely problematic. I only had time to create one new collage with a different Draco model. I kinda like the way he looks, typical disaster Draco, haha.
> 
> Anyway, you can find me gushing about these two on tumblr at dreville.tumblr.com.


End file.
